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Saturday, March 25, 2006 I'm finally back at home. . . The long-awaited book out day. . .Camp. . . It's so far away. . . Sungei Gedong camp, somewhere deep in Lim Chu Kang. . . A total stranger land to me. . . Everything's new. . . New system, new people, new environment. . . It took me a couple of days to adapt to the environment and system. . . As for the people there. . . There were two groups. . . One group includes me and 5 of the other guys from bmtc. . . The other belongs to those from the mono-intake. . . mainly from ite and ite nitec. . They underwent their basic military trainings there and had been there for more than two months. . . hence, they are so-called to 'old-birds' there. . . Definitely a different kinda people you see in bmtc, but i can assured that they are a nicer lot of people compared to most of the rest in bmtc. . . at least for those in my platoon. . . though sometimes i found them a little bit too rowdy. . . As for those from bmtc. . we came from the same place, and naturally, we tends to stick together. . . especially when you entered a platoon where there's no one you had previously knew. . The need to make new friend, i was the first to approach them for their conversation. . . Haha. . I never know i can be so friendly. . For the vocation, i can be considered lucky to join a support company as a driver. . I guess it's not wise to leak out what vehicle i'm driving and what kinda platoon i'm in here, in case they consider it as classified. . . But anyway, it's just better than becoming what i thought i was sent to, a trooper. . . A driver, it sounds slack. . . but so far, i haven't feel we had done anything less physical than any other people. . . Training remains the same for everyone, at least for now. . . And even if the job is slack, the battalion themselves will not give you opportunity to slack. . . A target of gold for IPPT for everyone, a 9min30sec for SOC. . . I can frankly admit that i can only do 3 chin-ups of the 12 needed for gold so far. . . And SOC. . finishing it within the bmtc passing time of 10.59secs may even be a problem, much less the targeted passing time. . . I'm almost sured to stay back during the saturday to do extra PTs. . . For this week, we had did some trainings which i felt were tough already, and yet they had called this the orientation, much more tough trainings to be expected. . . It's scary. . . 2 months of trade course marks this beginning. . . learning how to drive my vehicle with an extra task of passing the SOC within the target timing. . . We were treated like recruit throughout this period. . . the only good things are, we can book in and out in civilian attire, and we can keep our hair longer, other than that, we belongs to the class of recruit worst than bmtc. . . No mp3player, no camera phone, no snack except for plain biscuit, no use of vending machine, no use of phone before RO, sleeping before RO, a 5 and half day week etc etc etc. . . It's definitely a hell lot stricter here than bmtc. . . and the one enforcing the discipline, the CSM. . . People had said he's a bloody sadist. . . and i've got a taste of it, on thursday. . . He got me doing 40 push-ups and a run around the parade square for not greeting him. . . But well, it may has been easy, and it may not gonna be easy, but i still make it and needa make it through. . . I guess it's still important to maintain a positive attitude. . . and i'm persuading myself hard to do that. . . Sunday, March 19, 2006 10 days of leave, 10 days absence from the military, i'm so indulged into the civilian world that i almost forgotten that i'm still serving my full time national service. . . 10 days, it seems long, yet it's gone just like that. . . Sad. . . I can't deny that i'm sad and can't hide my fear to return to the army again, especially to my vocation, 42 Singapore Armour Regiment. . . as an infantry trooper. . . I've been told of the tough training in there. . . and to make it feel real, there's comparison of the level of toughness there with that i've gone through during BMT. . How am i gonna stop worrying after hearing all these. .It's a major disappointment to receive such a posting since i've been hoping for a slack vocation so that i can have time to do other things. . Now, not only is the plan foiled, it's almost game over for me. . . Back to army, back to square one. . . It's gonna be like my day of enlistment again tomorrow. . . Another round of adapting to army life, meeting new people, going through all the military trainings. . . As much as i know that i hate military life, as much as i felt so miserable going through all these, my life for this coming 1 year and 8 months will be disastrous if i continue to live in the army with this kinda attitude. . . I'm trying hard to convince myself that i can live well in the army, i can take all the tough trainings. i'm determine to go through all these, for the sake of going to my bright future. . . The thought of going to university, the thought of earning big bucks, getting myself a car and night house, they are gonna be my motivation. . . These little hardships will be nothing compared to the the amount of joy and luxury i shall be living in in the near future. . . 1 year and 8 months will be gone in no time, and the future is much for me to anticipate. . . I SHALL PERSEVERE AND I SHALL SURVIVE THE TRAININGS. . . enjoy my last few moments before i become an armour trooper. . .. .. .. Tuesday, March 14, 2006 It hurts to see you crying. . . I wish i can do anything. . . yet i couldn't. . . Maybe now i realised, the time you feel yourself to be most useless is the time you see the one you love going through hard times yet couldn't do anything about it. . .I'm left with 5 more days before my ns days start all over again. . . 5 days had gone. . just like this. . . i've been out almost everyday, yet there are still plenty that i've not done, even as i had the whole of today at home, slacking. . . I just wasn't in the right mood. . . but i shall not elaborate further. . . After much hesitation, i've finally made up my mind. . . Business. . . that's my choice. . i'm determine to try for business. . . I wouldn't want to care whether i'm cut out for it now, it's my final decision and i'm set to choose it. . . Other than that, aerospace engineering and biological chemistry will be one of my choice. . . Not in the mood for much to say. . . maybe some singing at k box later will brighten me up. . . Friday, March 10, 2006 9 weeks gone. . . and. . . POP lo. . .! Something to celebrate? No! The end of BMT marks the beginning of another long and disastrous life in the army. . .That day. . . i didn't ask any of my parent to come. . . for they were busy with work, i didn't feel the need to trouble them for an occasion like this. . which i think, is just another ceremony. . . I'm prepared to go through the experience during the enlistment day once again. . . no parent present, and they treated you like some outcast. . . But. . . Chee yong turned up. . . i had invited him the week before, yet it had remained an uncertainty. . until the moment. . . I was grateful. . . i felt fortunate to have his presence, at least i don't feel the eyes that are staring at me, thinking how pitiful a soldier i am to have no one there during his graduation. . The parade. . . after 3 rehearsals. . . enduring through the hot sun. . . the finale. . . a testament of the blood and sweat put in. . . still screwed up. . . Just one wrong command from the parade commander and one technical fault in the microphone system spoiled our whole show. . . Not forgetting the bunch of fools who had followed upon the wrong command. . . Nevertheless, i wouldn't care the less, it's done and over and that's the best thing to say. . . I've been thinking. . . all those past entries that had reflected on my miseries in the army. . i suddenly felt that i had complained too much. . . whined too much. . . I did these without realising that how badly they had reflected on myself. . . -only a pussy complain and whine so much. . . i decided that i should get on with life and stop whinning about army life. . . Class gathering. . . it's just good to see everyone again. . . i never stop missing my school days, my class back in camp. . . Gathering back, getting together, catching up. . it's just like returning back to the good old days. . . i always enjoyed the moments that we were together, fooling around, talking craps. . . Got back results, managed to scaped through and made it to the university and now. . . the question. . . which course to take. . ? it prove not an easy decision. . . Not cut up for business, no interest in engineering, tired of science, impossible for dentistry and medicine, computing too dry and boring, accountancy too specified, psychology too difficult. . . what can i take. . ? Lost of choice. . only hope to find an answer in tomorrow's universities open house. . . Sunday, March 05, 2006 At last. . . at last i found myself some time to blog again. . . Just booked out from camp and in just another 12 hours' time, i will find myself back in camp again. . .It's 3 more days to POP but yet i'm still stuck in the middle of nowhere, wandering whether i can complete my bmt or not. . . My ippt still couldn't pass, that's the greatest failure in the entire of my days in the army so far. . . It's frustrating, especially when you can score full marks for all the station, except for chin-ups. . . I barely managed 3, 3 more needed for a pass, 5 more needed for a silver and 9 more needed for gold. . . Getting sick of doing the ippt again and again while the rest who pass got their admin time. . . This coming tuesday will be another one. . . i pray for a pass. . . but i'm not confident of getting it. . . i'm just so weak. . . Yesterday was the finale for the route march. . . Everyone were doing their 24km march, except for me and a couple of others. . . We missed the 16km on attend c and were compensating it yesterday instead. . . And the worst is, we will have to sacrified one of the day during the block leave to do the 24km again. . . The feeling of seeing others celebrating the completion of their last march while knowing you still have one more to go seriously sucks. . . How i wish i hasn't fell sick and caused myself to miss the 16km. . . Nevertheless, everything is gonna be over soon. . . i just have to bear with it, bear with this damn sickening army life and go through them. . . Wednesday, March 01, 2006 It's just a few hours away. . .! My heart pumping faster and faster as it slowly approach the moment of great importance. . I guess by now my results have already been known. . . confirmed and settled. . . but i still pray. . . i pray i can get the result i want. . . i pray i can get to university. . . i pray i am eligible to get into the course i wanted. . . i pray that i will jump up with joy when i collect my result slip. . . i pray. . . |
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Profile Name: Chen Zhicai (Call me Keith!) Addictions Hangouts: K box, K pool Objectives Sometimes, what you want in life may not be what you will achieve in life. Sometimes, what you want in life will change as you came to realise of your limitations and constraints. Careers Team: Full-time v3 player archives September 2005 Tag Me!
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