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Tuesday, April 22, 2008 i received my first ever parking ticket. . congratulation. . cost me $8. . i hate to pay. . i never want to pay for parking and it only proved to be an unlucky day for me to be fined for it. . it's either an unlucky day or an unlucky spot, i will remember to buy coupon to place on my vehicle when i park there again. .it was my first tennis lesson. . yet again the kinda feel where you are pretty helpless. . and useless. . of course ive grown to learn that this is just the beginning and things will surely improved as the time goes. . im not dishearten or anything like that to see myself cant even master a single stroke, but the thing is that i cant help staring in green eyes when i see others equally new to the game playing with ease while i struggle even to hit the ball. . As you grow up, you realised you are not cut out in a lot of things. . and things became worse when you are a slow learner yourself. . nevertheless. . despite the adversities, you should never stay in your comfort zone and just stick to what you are best at. . like i was complaining that i should just play my soccer. . no matter how hard it is, learning one more new trade will be a great enhancement to your life. . yes, the more fuckup it becomes, the more hard you try. . IM MOTIVATED. . alright. . ive just got a psp slim last week. . i wont say im obsessed with it. . but ive been playing it daily. . but well this machine that i had bought for $385 kept giving me problems here and there. . pissed off sometimes, gonna get it to the shop and have the man to check out for me. . freaking lotsa troubles. . okie school. . sometimes feel quite unhappy with things. . sometimes i feel quite please with things. . it's kinda mood swing. . but all i have to say that it takes a lot of experience and work to become a good teacher. . im not up to it. . i can try and willing to try. . it's all back to the never say die attitude. . so sometimes when it's good, you feel good, sometimes when things don't turn up well, then you feel pretty lousy. . im not gonna complain things, i guess enough of my whinings, i will just take everyday as it comes and try my best in things to come. . Sunday, April 13, 2008 The headline. . Buddies turn against each other. .a fateful gathering turned out unfateful. . it was supposed to be a joyous, happy outing. . somehow it became pretty unfortunate. . if rong thinks he read me like a book. . then i am not afraid to announce that i read him, wei and roy like a book too. . i know what they are like. . their merits. . their flaws. . i accept their flaws with grace and take their merits with honour. . it's what buddies do. . if friends have to respect each others, what's more buddies. . define respect. . in my context right now. . it goes something like that. . even when your buddy is obviously at the wrong side, you don't tell him off straight away. . just like you don't tell your parents off when they obviously did something wrong. . instead, you find a good proper occasion and speak to him nicely. . Friends, are human beings, and human beings are human beings afterall. . there are occasions where they make mistakes. . misjudgement, and create misunderstandings. . Be the understanding one in the misunderstanding. . It's now about the word tolerant. . Understand the flaw of his, relent to his mis-actions, he will be grateful when he reflects later. . Wei is someone who speak his mind. . especially on the issue of 'righteousness'. . he is more of those kinda people who believe in being nice to everyone, whether is it a friend or stranger. . he hasnt got an idea about standing at the side of friend in the event of a dispute when it involve 'being righteous'. . Rong is someone who stand up for his buddies, even if he is at fault. . because he know us, the faith that he buddies won't do anything too wrong. . but sometimes, he's too rash and forgot about rationality. . It's almost totally opposite personality. . . it most likely crash if one side do not practise tolerant and respect. . however. . things sometimes spring out of control, that's where conflict arises. . it awaits a cool down for both of them and one side decide to relent. . rong is more of the mature one. . wei's thinking sometime a little bit too naive, although it's with kind intention. . hope they can resolve their differences and reconciled soon. . Tuesday, April 08, 2008 My bro is attached. .! Shots of intimate pictures between the two taken inside the laptop. . i took a quick peek into it. . . All the while i thought he doesnt care about affairs of the heart. . well. .it's good. . no wonder they say loves work wonder. . look at my brother. . mild temper nowadays. . not like last time, mood swing once in a while. . the magic of love i supposed. . happy for him, beneficial for me. . i don't have to stand his foul tempers. . at least for a while. . My brother goes for girls with nice character i assume. . hope that is the case. . Don't blame me if i still talk about work. . i always say things about work. . it's like gonna reflect that im someone not suitable to join the workforce yet. . of course. . if im rich enough, i will be happy not to work. . i've finally got someone who managed to pass my test. . jie shen from 4e6. . he managed to score 24 out of 30. . im happy for him, but it was no cause to celebrate. . it shows the disparity between him and the rest. . he's a nice boy, sitting quietly at one side, working hard with his questions. . a totally different person from the others. . i was expecting him to do well, fortunately he did not disappoint me. . i was finally able to give 4e6 the test, finished marking with the papers and as usual, it was a similar scenario to 4e5. . shaking my head as i mark through. . Im at a lost at how should i go about it. . yes chee yong and azhar advised me to go harder on them. . but it's not as easy as going to do it than say it. . have set the standard to in the beginning, will they still listen if you suddenly change your style. . it's a lot more other considerations other than this. . i wont go into details. . Right now im actually prepared to sound them out. . hopefully they are willing to listen. . it's their lives. . what i can do is to do my best to teach, the rest is up to them. . i realised ive made a mistake in one of the question. . the second time already. . it's seriously set me in a difficult position like this. . already not doing a good job with the teaching part and now, kinda like rubbing salt to the wound. . i got no hesitation to admit my mistake in front of the students. . im not afraid of losing face, i gracefully apologise to them for my mistakes. . i got a skin as thick as that of elephant's in this kinda situation. . but it's not a good time. . okie. . anyway. . the tuition thingy is giving a hell of a headache. . marcus is having cca all too often this week that i have to change the tuition times again. . feel like giving him a piece of my mind. . is he the only person busy. . mess up my schedule. . pissed. . Monday, April 07, 2008 Blues. . . i didnt really like monday. . it always look blue and it is a definite long day for me. .Weekend has been especially short. . i cant get enough of that sleep im needing. . it seems forever the case. . because give me a choice between going out to enjoy and staying at home to sleep, the earlier choice will make me forget that human beings actually need sufficient sleep to stay healthy. . You know when you don't sleep enough, the fatigue that accumulated as a result of long nights will cause your breath to be heaty and heavy, a sign of unwell. . im getting small doses of that right now. . The start of weekday essentially means work work and work. . it's pretty sian. . well. . the schedule for the weekday look something like this. . Wake up 6.30 am in the morning every day. . Monday will be a longer day. . estimated ending time. . 3pm. . Tuesday and thursday have tuition after school. . wednesday and friday only two days where you let your hair down a bit. . Possibility of tuition squeezing into friday = 75%. . so left only wednesday. . Some bad days you get relief classes that caused your short days to end long. . Some week like last week is more energy draining than the rest. . Tiring. . I gave a test to 4e5 today. , guess my highest student. . 13/30. . clap. . i cant say my paper is too tough. . personally extracted the questions from the paper they have did before, making slight amendment here and there and that's the result ive got. . im not sure if i should laugh or cry. . the second bad thing that occurred today was 4e6. . im little bit frustrated with this. . They took such a long time to proceed for my class and when i went over to get them eventually, not all turned up. . i was about to give them a test but by the time 20 minutes have passed and they was not enough time to do the test. . Monica suan was conducting a geography revision reliefing andrew yeo's class and some of them actually rather stay in the class. . I sent all of them back to the class, there was no point for the test with the kinda attendance and time im left with. . The third bad thing that happened was during mrs sundram's chemistry remedial with the 5N classes. . I was asked to go through one question with them but it seems that no one understand my explanations. . I think i myself also do not know what i am explaining. . For me it's something like this. . i need preparation before i go in. . because my mind tends to go blank easily. . i need time to think through to get an answer and then sort out how to put it across. . it's like those lousier processor you have got for your pc last time, kinda slow to process though it's workable. . you needa give it time to download all the information. . Well, all these actually made me feel kinda think that i have been doing a rather bad job. . Im not sure if i still need a longer time to adapt but it is still not going too well even though some time i do get the fake impression that i am doing well. . I do like this job, being able to teach things to people is something really nice feeling to me. . but liking and being able to do a good job is really two different issues. . im still not willing to draw a conclusion that if i am cut out to be this line, bearing the hope that things will improve as time goes. . It appears that time is running short. . when mid year is over in slightly more than a month's time, we will see if it's suitable for me. . Not to think about being outstanding, i just wanna get the basic tune right first. . |
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Profile Name: Chen Zhicai (Call me Keith!) Addictions Hangouts: K box, K pool Objectives Sometimes, what you want in life may not be what you will achieve in life. Sometimes, what you want in life will change as you came to realise of your limitations and constraints. Careers Team: Full-time v3 player archives September 2005 Tag Me!
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