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Sunday, July 27, 2008 As i looked through the cards. . i was suddenly indulged in a sea of emotions. . i don't know how to describe this feeling. . it's a mixture of happiness and sadness. . it is really intense. .No doubt im really sad to leave. . i wish to stay to help these people for their o levels. . because having me to help them and someone else is really really different. . im not referring as in im damn good at teaching, in fact im damn lousy actually. . but sometimes it's not about being really good or bad, it's the amount of dedication, the passion and the desire to do the thing. . every minutes and seconds that i was teaching them, i did it with the utmost sincerity. . i may not have done a good job, but im sincere in helping. . so well. . anyway. . i really thank my 4E5 and 4E2 for the card. . it was pretty memorable. . i have received a lot of cards in my life, but this one was something i will want to keep for a very long time. . thank you! i left school that day, 24 July around 3.45pm. . the day was fine, i left with a heavy heart. . pretty sad that im leaving the school again, leaving this bunch of students who i have been with. . It was a mere 4 months. . . Ups and downs. . and through all these we have developed a good relationship with each others. . I treated them more like my juniors than my students. . and it was more like a friendships that i have made. . Anyway. . i just want to say thank you. . and sorry. . to my classes from 4E5, 4E2, 4E6 as well as those sec 5s who have came to me for guidances for a while. . This short moment in bowen has been a wonderful experience with them around. . they were a fantastic lot of students. . really. . and i regret in any way that i have not been good in teaching or i have failed to help them. . Now, i have got to leave for my own studies. . i wish all of them will do well for their o levels. . and i will look forward to go down on result them to see them with tears of happiness. . it will be my happiness too. . Take care and study hard, beloved students. . with my 4E5 class. 
im needing some energy and lotsa time to finish the stories that had happened over the recent days. .well. . went drinking at our usual hangout yesterday. . it was part of the celebration for willy's birthday, before that we have had a dinner on thursday. . so anyway. . that was gonna be the last drinking session for me before uni starts and i can forsee that i won't be even able to afford that kinda time and money on alcohol anymore. . perhaps not that often. . i guess i had come to this stage whereby i can hold my alcohol pretty well. . i havent got wasted for very long time. . in fact i never. . the closest i went was getting really tipsy and spoke plenty of nonsense on one of the night at the pub. . i did have quite a bit yesterday night too. . but i still went home a sober person. . level upped for my tolerance. . shall not dwell any further, in case people think i am a alcohol addict. I was pretty hostile to kelvin goh during soccer in the morning. . felt really bad about it. . some times i can be damn relax while playing, but when i get serious, and i put in really much effort in keeping the game going, i cant tolerate mistakes. . we were playing against the navy team and after losing to them times and again, i was determined to go in and kick their asses out of the court. . that explains that anger. . i just got those kinda 'don't want don't like to lose' attitude. . im sure people who play with me understand. . No hard feelings, kelvin go for friendship in and out of the game, i go for victory in the game and then friendship out of the game. . i don't bear grudges for clashes that occurred in the court. . nevertheless we still managed to get the navy team out. . i was really determined not to lose again. . I am the current in charge of my nurture programme at toa payoh. . and seriously speaking, i am not too sure if i am the right person for the job. . i feel i am squeezing every juice out of myself in order to perform my duties. . with my kinda experience, simple things like chairing a meeting is a demanding business to me. . dealing with the kids is another challenge. . but it sometimes rather tricky. . not an easy task. . yesterday i went down to check out on the activities run by the nyjc interactors and i have to be the bad guy, stopping all the games and give them a lecture for not behaving. . then there was jonathan throwing a truant at the middle of everything, something i seriously hate. . i thought of letting him be initially, but somehow i still went over to talk to him. . i have not had the slightest idea of whether doing these is right or wrong. . there's no one to teach me, no book to refer. . i just hope, pray hard that it's a correct thing to do. . to b c'tinued> Friday, July 25, 2008 It's been a long awaited post. .given the serious problem my desktop is in, i didnt have the means to blog till i got my sis's macbook. . till i have the energy to do so. . not that im not tired right now. . well, i doubt im completely this post. . maybe just start it off with part 1. . . im damn tired. . when im tired i don't like thinking. . or in fact i cant. . so people who know me well enough should know that i got some mood swing when im tired. . i won't be too keen in engaging in conversation, because it requires thinking. . Talking requires you to think of the topics to talk about, to analyse the subject and give an answer to it etc. . so i most of the time i will just keep rather quiet. . alright. . today is friday. . or i should say it's saturday already. . it was matriculation day and i spent large part of my day in NUS, listening to lectures, attending the registration thingy as well as the cca fair. . i got another og, too. . it's for the o week. . no one's too keen on this now, after attending the foc. . we were all preferred to be in our own foc og clique rather than entertaining new people you don't know. . it wasnt a day that i feel like entertaining. . and........... continue next time. . im too tired to continue Saturday, July 12, 2008 Next week gonna be another busy week again. . im still figuring how should i sort up my schedule. .Taking over mrs sundram's classes from mon to thurs. . im not sure how i gonna handle it. . they are all the classes i most not want to take. . the sec 5 na. . i guess i will just most likely leave the classroom management thing aside,not gonna handle their discipline problems. . Anyway, im still in a dilemma on whether i should quit after next week. . i feel like. . yet i wish to help my 4e5 and 4e6 for a little while more. . but then schedule already so hectic and tiring. . morning to school, afternoon still have tuitions and then now, have to set time for the rag thingy. . I don't mind the hectic part, it makes time pass faster, but the tiring part, i need some good long sleep. . cant be taking coffee every morning to wake myself up. . im already becoming a caffeine addict already. . i went for the rag thingy yesterday after school. . far and expensive journey to nus and i predict myself travelling like pretty frequently this month. . i had volunteered for the float. . cant dance for nuts seriously. . so i go behind the scene. . it's really a lot to be done. . yet the issue is, i cant commit that much time given the kinda schedule im having now. . perhaps after quiting school i will have more time and energy to do this. . going to do this after school is really exhausting, and i havent have that much mood to entertain new people. . anyway. . i appeared to be very enthusiastic to work on the float. . i am. . since im there just do whatever i can lo. . some of the seniors got the impression i am very hardworking. . well, i just rather have something to keep myself occupied. . alright. . i guess i will most likely cancel most of my tuitions next week. . jerry's leaving after next week. . gonna spend some time catching up with him before he becomes the next person i know to fly to australia to study. . so many things to do! sianz Monday, July 07, 2008 Warning: The following image may cause discomfort and uneasiness. Please close your eyes and this window immediately if you experience such symptoms. I guess a picture speaks a thousand words. . This picture depicts one of the scenario in the camp. . I was dressed up as a woman and showcased in a MTV presentation. . well not only me, there was another guy from the other og. . we dance, shake our butts and made sexy moves in this spice girls mtv, spice up your life. . . i wonder anyone recorded our presentation down, but i supposed it was really really funny. . . and i havent imagine myself doing that. . I got xiao wei to thank for that, she was the one who sabo me. . anyway, it was good fun. . just kinda embarrassing. . but seriously. . do i looked hot? hahaaaa. . please don't puke upon seeing it. . anyway. . that wraps up for the camp. . it was fun. . yes. . and i was enthu. . yes . . but i still find it a pity that i havent know more people. . havent made myself a prominent enough person. . so now. . im seeing myself to join rag and flag. . but there's still a matter of forking the time out. . still have to go back to bowen and there's tuition and all that craps to settle. . damn sian. . i wanna make my uni life exciting man! Sunday, July 06, 2008 Super nice. . super enthusiastic. .Akit FOC 2008. . It was pretty fun. . Really fun, i told myself it really was. . not to the extent that im falling head to heel over it, well, when you think it's fun, it will be. . Cant understand? To put it in simple terms, the camp was quite fun. . not very. . and i will wanna think that it was a lot more fun than it really was because ive really tried my best to throw my heart and soul into making myself enjoy the camp. . Well, i started off the first day reaching late for the camp. . Delayed by the stupid mobilisation briefing. . this sort of things ever seems so waste of time. . Quite worried that i wouldnt be able to integrate myself into the og after missing the first part of the day that included the most crucial icebreaker games. . Upon arrival, i was immediately joining them for games. . though it was kinda awkward as i know none of them at all. . yet coincidentally, kevin, fellow srjcian in akit was in the og which we were playing the game against. . So somehow or rather, i didnt wait too long to get the first person i know. . Nevertheless, it was just the start of 4 days worth of enthusiasism from me. . i wanted to go into the camp, make some friends and totally enjoy myself after a week of hardwork before this. . Heard from people who had went for the arts camp that they had some terrific time. . i want to be like that too. . Did not mind not sleeping just to get the most fun out of it. . Anyway. . i tried and was really enthu. . and i realised, this is about just going all out, not caring about how people see you and totally let go of yourself. . My og. . they were nice people. . just that sometimes i feel perhaps not too on. . well whatever, when no one lead, i tried to lead. . we have some great times playing games, and it makes me feel good to be entertaining them too. . Im from Ando, which came from the name of the famous architect, Tadao Ando. . We are red, we are a bunch not that kinda super enthu people, yet among our own, we are a fun lot to be with. . -to be continued. . part 1 ends. |
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Profile Name: Chen Zhicai (Call me Keith!) Addictions Hangouts: K box, K pool Objectives Sometimes, what you want in life may not be what you will achieve in life. Sometimes, what you want in life will change as you came to realise of your limitations and constraints. Careers Team: Full-time v3 player archives September 2005 Tag Me!
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