Thursday, September 20, 2007

the bus seemed to be travelling so slowly. . . i just can't wait to be flying back home and to be somewhere quiet, where i can face all these alone. . .

perhaps now it is not so intense any more, but still i really don't want to be conscious about what had really happened. .

i never felt like this before. . . it was worse, far worse than all the failures i had experienced before, how could this be happening to me. . .

hopelessly useless. . . why am i so fucking useless. . . it seems no matter how hard i tried, i still ended up failing. . . why must it be this way. . . i really want my license. . . !! i desperately want. . !

i can't restrict this agony and pain from devouting my entire soul. . . it hurts more than any physical injuries i had sustained before. . .

hui juan who was with me, got her license this time round. . . it was like a double blow. . . like i'm suddenly left alone, to continue walking this tedious journey. . . i wish this isn't true. . .

defeat again. . . it wasn't because of my determination that i'm still trying. . . but with all that i had already put in, there was never another option for me other than continue trying. . . 5 times, 6 times or even 10 times, i will continue to try. . . but how many more times of this kinda of devastation can i withstand before i go berserk. . . i don't know, it's just painful to me. . .

nothing seems to make me feel better. . . the agony, i could still feel it destroying my spirit inside. . . maybe i should just sleep, wake up and forget that this had happened. . .
till 1 nov, the next test.

[ No.4 scores on ] | 12:30 PM | Comment(s)

My IPOD Music Chart

1.罗志祥 - 搞笑
2.罗志祥 - 第二顺位
3.王力宏 - 心跳
4.罗志祥 - 幸福不灭
5.罗志祥 - 个中强手
6.周杰伦 - 时光机
7.林俊杰 - 我还想她
8.周杰伦 - 说好的幸福呢

Profile

Name: Chen Zhicai (Call me Keith!)
Date of Birth: 3rd January 1987
Horoscope: Capricorn
Country: Singapore
School: Before- Xinmin Primary, Bowen Secondary, Serangoon Junior College. Now- 42 SAR, SP Coy, SPIKE Platoon. Future- National University of Singapore, Architecture.

Addictions

Hangouts: K box, K pool
Music Genre: Chinese Pop
Singer: Jay Zhou
Songs: 用心听. 背叛. 退后. 非你莫属. Kiss Goodbye.
Games: Football Manager, Winning Eleven, DOTA
Sports: Soccer, Pool
Club: Liverpool
Player: Steven Gerrard

Objectives

Sometimes, what you want in life may not be what you will achieve in life. Sometimes, what you want in life will change as you came to realise of your limitations and constraints.
University- A course that i want.
Pre-University- Car License/Bike license, get my own bike.

Careers

Team: Full-time v3 player
Jersey No.: 4
Position: Right Back
Description: Ambitious
History: Bowen 'C' Division(2001), Bowen 'B' Division(2002-2003), NYJC(2004 1st 3mths)

CCA: ODAC
Position: Logistics Officer
Achievements: 2nd Orientation Camp 2005 Commandant, Mt Ophir Expedition 2005, Vertical Marathon 2005, Surf n Sweat 2005, NTU Adventure Trail Challenge 2004, National Youth Achievement Bronze

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