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Thursday, March 12, 2009 You know. . . it has been tough. . . tiring. . really. . there were many times whereby you really feel very sleepy, that you can just doze off while you are holding on that pencil. . drawing. . it happened quite a number of times today. . . somehow, some reason, you held on, force yourself to stay awake and get those work done. . . it may be sparked off from a negative, kiasu mentality. . but when you know that you are weaker than the rest, you know you need to work harder than the rest. . be it stay back an hour or two longer while others went back home. .many times it just doesnt seem too feasible or practical. . when that fatigue accumulate to a certain level, it could be just clever to go back and get some rest first instead. . nevertheless, held on, because intuition tells you so. . so what if you are not being efficient this way. . outstanding architects don't do conventional stuffs, don't go with practicality. . . we may seem weird to others, but you can never imagine the amount of substance we have inside. . . i had digressed. . but if my students are reading. . hope you get some learning points out of there. . The point here is. . im really happy. . as in satisfied. . it was perhaps the best critique session that i had got. . maybe it was because darlene is really nicer than the rest of the tutors i had got previously. . it's still great to be receiving praises. . fong never praised me. . even when im feel i had slogged hard. . I feel i had worked hard, and i have tried to learn much, pick up pointers and improve my works. . I need to feel that my efforts have brought me progress. . and darlene's words were pretty nice to my ears. . of course it wouldnt be possible without the rest of the other two group mates of mine, i felt we worked really well together, especially during the presentation just now. . we have got pretty good team work, such that darlene could joke that we are husband wife. . great. . entertaining in the mist of great concepts communicated. . i wouldnt care the less even if reputation is at stake. . Great. . i hope this is the starting point to more to come. . and yes. . i will continue to work hard. . oscar and sean, be careful. . ! Thursday, February 19, 2009 A role model. . i am. . . 打不死的蚂蚁Learn from me. . the good things. . Have you seen me lately. . ? I'm like. . vanished from this world. . I was busy. . with lots and lots of work. . i have been working hard. . i don't know. . may be harder than most people. . many nights in studio. . drawings, building models. . i worked so hard. . i hope my works are good. . i hope the results are good. . Sometimes, really tired. . but with the help of some caffaine, i hung on. . i know im not good at this, i work harder. . really tried hard. . last weekend i went three days without sleep. . for what. . ? i want A for my design module. . Life is like that. . you won't always get back as much as you had worked. . Today's presentation, the conclusion to the weeks of exercise. . it was really bad for me. . bad as in i got all the bad comments. . it was like those singing competition you have on tv, the judges gave you negative comments. . I was standing there at the centre of the crit panel, bombarded by the tutors. . Harsh wind blew, and i felt the chill. . While i had thought i have thoroughly prepared for the harsh winter, when the cold wind came, i was left in a state of shock. . The false notion of being sufficiently prepared led to misfortune that may ineventually ruin the A or even B+ that has been targeted. . To be honest im damn depressed initially, because i had really put in effort in this. . yet all of it was ruined by that few minutes which i had no idea what hits me actually. . I concede that my concept for the houses were wrong, but what saddened me was the comment on my drawings, which i had spent lotsa time and effort on. . basically they meant, it sucks. . But depression was temporary, i realised i needa move on, be conscious about the mistakes i had made and start all over again. . A for design still possible. . Gonna work hard and produce good works to impress. . Some day i will want people to pay attention to my crit. . just like oscar, ying zi and jolene. . All the way............! Thursday, January 29, 2009 Jaded. . had a long day. . .it was not any of that good day. . that's why i felt like making some noise here. . Issued with a new design assignment. . 27 A3 panels, plus one cardboard model, that's what due on this coming monday. . barely four days to go. . you wander why i still have the time to make noise here. . because i don't know where or how to start. . resources still lacking. . i decide im just gonna have an early night and then start early tomorrow. . it's gonna be a very very hectic weekend for me. . already before this assignment my schedule lined till saturday. . with this coming in, im desperately trying to squeeze time to accommodate it while still keeping the planned activities. . i will be burning the entire of sunday in studio then. . opportunity cost. . I lost one of the datalogger during noon. . . had it installed at the FASS canteen yesterday evening, and now it's gone. . apparently some brainless kid took it without realising it is actually a useless device to them, while it meant a lot to me. . i curse that idiot who did this. . Still waiting for my lecturer to get back to me on how to account for it. . haiz. . Drenched of energy after studio just now, but i still made a point to turn up for the hall's soccer training. . . obviously they were training the 'first team' and it more or less confirmed that i wasnt part of it. . i felt like a fringe player assisting to train up the first team's defence and wingers. . disgusted. . I made up my mind that if im not called up for the next friendly, i will have a good talk with the captain and attend no more training. . i don't see the rationale why i am exhausting myself after studio times and again to attend trainings and train so hard for ihg while eventually i don't get to play. . . not that i think i am damn good, but in soccer, i won't stay in a team which take me as a fringe player. . Further more. . seriously i don't see myself inferior to marcus in any aspect of soccer. . if they are gonna play him instead of me. . which was apparent to me. . that's another reason for me to say goodbye. . i rather spend more time in my studies. . Wednesday, January 28, 2009 Isnt Chinese new year supposed to be a week long. . ? Too used to long holiday and im finding this chinese new year far too short. . comparing to last year's at least. . oh well. . remember last year school still hasnt started. .Im back in school already. . in hall. . on this second day of chinese new year. . pathetic. . the holiday's over. . i needa get myself out of that chinese new year mood and get cracking. . somehow still feel lethargic even though i had slept pretty much over these few days. . Assignments coming in. . i guess it won't be too long for those sleepless nights to come back again. . haizz. . Tuesday, January 13, 2009 You sure this is the first day of school. . ?I try not to make this too melancholic, but im. . stress! first day of school, with all the expectations, things that are coming up. . Too many stuffs on a short period of time, for a moment i felt i cant handle. . Nothing seems to get to my brain. . don't know why. . New studio, and they were trying to set up a new seating arrangement. . when ask for suggestions, i wanted to contribute, but nothing came out in my brain. . it was blank. . i tried, but i couldn't think of anything. . The new assignment, which deals with exhibition. . was supposed to panel design. . nothing comes to my mind, and i got nothing to talk about. . i felt screwed. . Am i suffering from some memory problem? i felt certain things just kept slipping from my mind. . like the da vincl model that we did last sem, i almost forgot how it's supposed to work. . this is not helpng. . Stress. . we have fong as our tutor, and he wanted us to draw something for discussion every session. . already been allocated something for thursday's session. . but nothing comes up in my mind . . first day of school . . shouldn't be whining. . shouldn't be whining. . Saturday, January 03, 2009 Today's my birthday. . Happy. . birthday. . !Many thanks to those who have remembered. . and for those who havent. . . i strongly recommend that you do something. . upon seeing this. . . haahaa. . im just kidding. . you know im not so thick skin. . well. . twenty second. . feel kinda old already. . evidence from the growing amount of white hair on my head. . irritating. . i think im suffering from some genetic disorder that caused this phenomenon. . nevertheless. . i supposed im still suave and charming . .? oops. . just let me praise myself and feel good. . since it's my day. . today. . Anyway. . Seriously i feel perhaps as you grow older, birthday become less and less significant. . it's just another day. . remember when we were young, we always look forward to birthday. . a day where you got to eat cake, receive presents and get sayang by people. . Now. . from this year onwards. . I won't expect much on my birthday. . . not presents, not cakes. . it will be good enough if i can have some good friends to come together, meet up for a meal or something. . Im getting more mature in my thinking, aint i. . Okie. . thanks people for your wishes. . i won't deny i feel good to have received these. . thank you. ! Friday, December 26, 2008 Good or not good is comparative, satisfaction is given within. . .I don't mind openly declaring that i got 3.5. . It's not anything marvellous, if i would compare this with others from my course, i think it will be shit. . . but im not comparing, so that i won't feel like shit of course. . Yet im satisfied. . with all those screwed ups i had made in this sem, 3.5 is a bonus already. . Im happy. . I promise to work harder next sem. . more sleepless nights. . Afterall, i never aspire to be the best, never dream to be in the dean's list. . only wanted to be a mediocre student and quietly complete this 5 years course. . i am that. . unambitious. . |
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Profile Name: Chen Zhicai (Call me Keith!) Addictions Hangouts: K box, K pool Objectives Sometimes, what you want in life may not be what you will achieve in life. Sometimes, what you want in life will change as you came to realise of your limitations and constraints. Careers Team: Full-time v3 player archives September 2005 Tag Me!
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